A Single Mom’s Frustration

I’m so tired of people telling me to be consistent, that I have to be dedicated, and that I have to do what they do in order to make it.

I’m sorry, not so sorry that I need to do it my way. My way, if that means I have to learn the hard way. Because their way hasn't worked for me.

I let myself get all bent out of shape, frustrated, angry and even depressed at times because I’m not performing and putting the time in like what “they” tell me I should. In the man’s world it’s competition, all in and nothing else, this way or no way. There’s no grace.

Here’s the thing, I don’t function in that way. I have to honor my values. And those are not my values. Sure I can be a bit competitive; however, in my heart, I want to see everyone succeed. I have to feel and listen in on what resonates and works for me. Yes, if I want change it will take work. However, I have to look at my priorities and make the steps necessary to find balance and keep a certain flow so my world doesn’t turn upside down. Instead of doing what two parents would come together to help in an ideal circumstance, it’s only me. And I have to give myself credit and a whole lot of grace, because I got this far, I've overcame so many obstacles, and I’m not where I use to be.

I continue to choose better with each given day. And better for me is not just financially but in all aspects of my life: mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically, in my relationships with my children especially and even more so with myself. This is balance when all is considered. So in order to not feel bent out of shape, frustrated and angry, I’m going to honor my time by prioritizing and making the space to do so. And that will require me to be honest with my time and where I can create space to honor what is important. Allocate my time, and create a consistent habit to stay focus whether that’s 10 minutes, 30 minutes or whatever. The point is making the space and being consistent. We already know what needs to be done. The question is- are we willing to make the steps forward?

I Am Ready.